Well, its been 5 years. Five good and life changing years.  Since today marks Ian and I's 5th wedding anniversary, I have to start this blog off by first thanking his mom, Dianne, for introducing us so long ago. At the time I remember thinking how much she resembled the late Princess Dianna and that if she was this beautiful, her son might be worth checking out as well. Then I glanced at the last name embroidered on her long white lab coat...Niecko, I like that, I could do Niecko. And next thing you know, voila, Ian enters the picture. 

Neither one of us anticipated it happening so fast, but I am sure glad that we decided to take he plunge and as the Queen says, Keep Calm and Marry On!

Last weekend, in early celebration of our anniversary we headed to Anchorage. Ian had to teach a mental health first aid class and I thought I was just tagging along for support. However, he surprised me with a weekend getaway to what he called my very own "Jane Castle." Knowing that I love all things English and Jane Austen, he booked us a weekend stay at a B & B strait from the Tudor era. It not only looked the part, but we also had personal tea time daily. 

The best part however, was the room that held a dozen roses, chocolates, and a hand written poem by my personal Mr. Darcy aka Ian.  It was extremely thoughtful and romantic. 

Without question it has been an adventurous 5 years. For the first 2 years of it we were immersed in rural Alaskan life.  When I look back through these blogs I can see the transformations that have occurred in both of us individually and together as a couple.  Color is what comes to mind. 

There also seems to be some primary internal color of the human soul that cannot be seen by the visible eye and can only be experienced from within. This is how I would summarize our last 5 years, one of learning to see the invisible and allowing it to permeate and radiate from a deeper place. 

When I think on this, I could easily assign a color to each year of our marriage. A color that was both felt and seen.  When we first got married I would assign red, red hot. Wouldn't most of you say this is how you felt the first few months of marriage as well?

Red, though, has a way of changing. During our time in the bush I would assign a grey color; sometimes it was dark black, sometimes it was pure white, but when you mixed the two together you would always get a variable shade of grey. Part of our growth in the bush was in going through the problems, not coming up to them and saying that they were too great or too large, but actually going through them. Many times we had to leave our fears at the door, enter in, and hand and hand, step by step,  go through. The beauty now is in seeing how this unfolded, knowing we have overcome. 

When we moved to Juneau things seemed to really change and I would assign these last 3 years various shades of green, mostly for growth. Where once I was anxious to discover the future, I am now learning to look at it through the eyes of who I already am and not just as what I will become. Learning to become present in every moment helps illuminate the colors of my life and my life with Ian and with others.

This next year as we both start our doctorates I see blue; an open clear sky of serenity. Of course things may change and our clear skies may sudden open to down pours, storm clouds, or gusts of wind however I hope that the yellow sun of our souls will continue to permeate even the gloomiest of days and illuminate our way.

Yellow illumination is the color I am taking with me to Nepal next week. I am headed on my most extreme medical mission trip yet. In anticipation of trekking in the Himalayas for 3 weeks at 16,000 feet without showering, I know I will need more than physical endurance and personal hygiene wipes to get me through. I am hopeful that as I push myself physically and mentally I will remember the journey of the last 5 years and be open to unlocking more parts of myself that are ready to be revealed.

Blessings, love, and peace -
Sarah